


Flesh and Blood

by misshoneywell



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Modern Era
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-12 01:13:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19121581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misshoneywell/pseuds/misshoneywell
Summary: Out of options, out of luck, and out of desperation, Rey makes the one choice she's avoided for all these years: Ben Solo.Modern AU. Adult themes.





	Flesh and Blood

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first foray into posting in a new fandom and it's terrifying. I hope you don't hate this! I just had to get the idea out of my brain. Also, they are cousins in this fic.

"What do you want?” he asked in a voice as flat as his dark stare.

He leaned against the doorway and looked at her with those creepy alligator eyes and a blank, tight expression on a face that was too handsome to be called ugly but too stark, too raw, and too there to be attractive. Not that she should be thinking about that at all for a multitude of reasons. One being that he was her cousin. The other that he was a dick of the highest order. And why the hell had she even shown up there, again?

“Hello,” Ben said. The word dropped an octave from flat to deceptively bored. He snapped in her face, and like magic, freezing rain fell from the sky as if he’d called it down himself just to fuck her over. “Care to share why you’ve darkened my door at half past midnight?”

“Jesus, Benny. Can I at least come in before we get into this?” Rey asked through chattering teeth. She had to crane her neck to look at him. She had forgotten how tall he was, how intimidating when he wanted to be, probably because she was always busy proving that she was just as strong and capable as any boy.

“I don’t know.” His lip curled. “Can you?”

“C’mon. Please.” She dropped her attitude, because quite frankly, she couldn’t afford it. She had three dollars and a whole lot of bad luck in her pocket, and her asshole, privileged relation was her last hope, hideous as it was to admit.

“Interesting.” The word came out as a drawl, slow and condescending. But maybe even a little surprised, which inexplicably pleased her, because at least it was an emotion other than remote, reptilian coldness. “You’d beg?”

“I don’t want to,” she gritted out. “But I would, yeah.”

He stared at her a long moment. A tantalizing gust of warmth and the scent of hot coffee wafted from the interior of the house, practically pleading for her to come inside. It was completely at odds with the demeanor of the owner.

Solo Place, her favorite refuge as a child, had been off-limits to her for years now, ever since her aunt and uncle had died in a tragic accident. She’d thought about it often since, with its ivory bannisters perfect for sliding and cozy reading nooks inside a posh library with thousands of books and a little statue of a cat with emerald eyes she used to play with on the oriental rugs of one of the formal drawing rooms.

But that was a long time ago, and once her childhood nemesis owned Solo Place, Rey hadn’t been back since. Until now.

Because she was broke. And on the verge of homelessness. And desperate. And if the gleam in her cousin’s eye was an indication, he knew it, despite her past best efforts to hide her dire situation from all forms of social media, former friends, and other connections, because her pride wouldn’t allow her to show him such weakness. Not smug, wealthy, creepy, asshole Ben Solo, also known as Kylo Ren, the alias he used for his best-selling novels.

She practically bit through her lip when chilly rain sluiced down the back of her neck, the downpour growing stronger.

“Ben,” Rey said. She wrapped her arms around herself, her faded jacket not sufficient to keep out the damp. “Please.”

There was a flicker in his eyes before they flattened and narrowed, and for one dismal minute, she thought he was going to shut the door in her face. But then he stepped back and waved a hand with exaggerated politeness.

“By all means,” he said, all gentleman. “Come in.”

She walked into the house and a wave of peace washed over her. It was strange, how much you could miss a house, but it was more than that to her. Solo Place was a part of her and she hadn't fully allowed herself to grieve the loss of it pin her life until now, reminding her of not just memories of the house itself but her beloved aunt, uncle and parents as well. 

"You're dripping."

She startled. "What?"

"You're getting the floor wet and filthy while you stand there all agog and starry-eyed," Ben said dryly, ruining her moment. "What did you need, Rey?"

"Can I have something to drink first?" She stuffed her hands into the pockets of her wet dress to hide the shaking of her hands. She didn't want to appear any more vulnerable than she already had. 

Ben shrugged. "Make yourself at home," he said, waving down a hall she knew led to the kitchen. "You always did. Until you didn't."

She held her tongue, refusing to rise to the bait. Though he was a silent walker, always eerily so even as a kid, she could practically hear him breathing down her neck as he followed her. Unfortunate. She had hoped for a moment to herself to collect her bearings before the uncomfortable conversation ahead. 

"I'm almost afraid to make any noise," she said, attempting lightness. She focused on the gleam of the marble beneath her feet. “I don't want Mrs. Jenkins to run down and stop me from making a cup of tea on my own."

"That won't be a problem. She no longer works here."

"What?" She gasped, and whirled around, her hand hovering over the swinging doors of the kitchen. "But she was an institution at Solo Place."

He looked at her with impassive eyes. "Institutions don't make dinner. And she had long outlasted her usefulness."

"You...you are so..."

"Yes?" Ben asked, baring his teeth at her in the semblance of a smile. Daring her to push him. "Do go on."

Rey swallowed her words and choked on them. She went through the door. 

Nothing had changed except for a few modern replacements to old appliances. But the cups were still in the same place, and the tea kettle as well as the tea, and she fumbled through the process under the watchful, awkward stare of her cousin. 

"So..." she started, turning around with a forced pleasant expression. "Remember when..." 

"Are you here to go down memory lane or hit me up for a handout? Before I’d prefer just to skip the former and get right to the begging." 

Her nostrils flared and she snapped, all pretense of politeness gone."Fuck you, Ben."

"Kylo, if you please," he said stiffly, adjusting the cuffs of his expensive shirt. "I stopped going by Ben years ago. And Benny? Unacceptable." 

"Kylo? I'll never call you that," Rey said, rolling her eyes. She touched a smooth rock that Aunt Leia had picked up on some trip and then flinched when her cousin brought his hand slamming down onto the counter next to the stone.

"Then you'll never get a single thing from me. A single thing." He caught her eye and she shivered. "Understand?"

Her nostrils flared, and they had a silent game of tug o' war before she internally slapped herself. She had no weapons in this fight. She was armorless and at his mercy, and she was throwing down the gauntlet over some stupid professional nickname. 

"I understand," she made herself say. "Kylo."

A humorless hint of a smile tugged at his lips. "Now, was that so hard?"

It really was. She clenched her fist. "So will you help me or not?"

He turned away from her and walked to a cabinet, pulling out a bottle of pricey liquor that Uncle Han had favored. He poured himself a generous glass, taking his merry time before answering her. "Why should I?"

She pulled out the ace up her sleeve, her only trick left. "Because you owe me, Be...Kylo." 

He took a long sip from his expensive glass of bourbon before speaking, disdainful amusement lacing his words. "I would love to hear you explain that."

Rey looked up at the ceiling and then back at him. 

"Just...I know they're about me. The books," she added unnecessarily. 

There. She said it. She put thoughts into words that she never thought she'd admit outloud. Because to say them meant that she'd read his shitty novels. That she'd deigned to spend her time on something that'd he created and profited on. And then...god...there was the discomfort of acknowledging...the other things. 

Ben, whom she would never think of as Kylo, paled. It was quite a feat considering he was already just shy of ghostly. Then his jaw ticked, and it was only when the glass cracked in his hand that she realized how affected he was by her words.

"You...have always been the most arrogant girl I've ever known," he said quietly. 

“Am I wrong?” she asked, hiding her shaking hands by filling a tea cup with the hot liquid. 

“I’m seconds away from throwing you out.”

“Am I?” she pushed. 

He took another drink from his glass before leveling a stare at her. Then he made a long affair of replacing his glass, filling it with a generous measure of liquor, and downing almost all of it in one go. 

“And what if you were right?” he asked flatly. 

“Then I’d say as your...muse? I deserve at least a place to stay until I get back on my feet.” 

He coughed, and she realized he was choking on the last sip of his expensive liquor. “Live here?” Ben asked once he’d recovered, incredulous. “I’d just as soon write you a check.” 

Rey shook her head. “I don’t want money. I don’t need it. I have a job lined up, just...I need a permanent address. That’s all. I’m not blackmailing you, for god's sake. I’m appealing to your humanity. Or what little you have of it.”

He gave her another one of his dangerous looks. “You have an interesting way of begging.” His face had settled into a calmer expression, and she realized he was getting both his bearings and the upper hand back. “The truth is, Rey, I don’t really owe you anything. And the books are not about you. The woman in the books is tall, blonde, and beautiful. She’s smart, independent, and would never show up at my door at midnight making ludicrous demands. I haven’t thought about you in years. You’re nothing to me.”

Ouch. 

“Okay,” she said, carefully placing the tea cup back onto the counter. She wanted to throw it against the wall, but didn’t, because she remembered long talks with her Aunt Leia while drinking tea from that very cup and eating freshly made scones. She also thought about being hungry, living on the street, losing a potential new job because she didn’t have a stable home. 

She turned away and gathered herself together. Took a breath. Picked up the cup again and took a sip that scalded her tongue. 

“That was...rude. But I’m willing to overlook it.” Rey turned back around and stifled a gasp.

He stood in front of her then, inches away.

“Yeah?” Ben’s body, once tense, had loosened. His face relaxed but his eyes remained sharp and hard and bright. “What else are you willing to overlook, cousin?” He stepped forward again, crowding her against the counter. “How far are you willing to take that...forgiveness?”

She thought about when they were small, and he was her size but gangly, pale, and weird. How he always unnerved her but she was never scared, never allowed herself to be truly intimidated. She channeled that and tried to stop her heart from beating straight out of the cage of her chest. 

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“I think you do.” His voice was silky with dark promise. “You obviously read my books. You know what my mind is capable of. But what about my body?” he asked in a thoughtful, mock-wondering tone. “Have you thought about what my body is capable of? Are you...willing to find out?”

Their eyes met a long moment. She debated. She felt sick, and desperate, and something. 

“I-” Rey stopped. “I…”

She dropped her tea cup, shattering the moment and porcelain all over the exquisitely marbled floor. Dropped to her knees and started picking up the pieces in jerky, reflexive movements.

“Ouch,” she hissed, bright blood welling on her palm.

She was suddenly being pulled to her feet then. When she looked up, Ben was staring at her with anger and frustration. “You are a mess,” he said through clenched teeth. “And incredibly self destructive.”

“It was an accident!”

He scoffed, yanked open a cabinet, and pulled out a bandage and antiseptic. “Only because you won’t leave.”

A lightbulb went off then. “You’re trying to run me off,” Rey realized aloud, her expression thunderous. She tried to pull her hand away but he held firm to the point of pain.

“No shit,” he said, sarcasm thick on his tongue. He applied the ointment with precision that somehow betrayed his vexation. “And you were about to fuck me for a room.”

Her face went hot and her insides churned like she had been set to sea. “Fuck you. I wasn’t! You caught me off guard, you disgusting asshole.”

“Oh, so we’re back to name calling then?” He gave her a cold look beneath his ridiculously long, black eyelashes that she had been jealous of since childhood. He affixed the bandage to her palm with a gentleness that did not match the storminess of his countenance. “Honestly Rey, I’m exhausted. It’s been a nice visit, but I think it’s time for you to go back to...wherever you came from.” 

He released her hand and stepped away. 

“Ben,” she said, her hands clenched by her sides. “I’m sorry. Please. Really.”

But he wasn’t listening. He walked away from her, pointing to the front door while heading toward the wide staircase that led to the second floor. 

The quiet was deafening. The grandfather clock they’d hid in as children ticked close by. She collapsed on a kitchen chair, still and panicking. When she finally checked the time again, twenty minutes had passed. 

He hadn’t kicked her out was her only positive thought. 

It hadn’t been a great meeting. But, he hadn’t really made her to leave. And something she knew about Benjamin Solo was that if pressed, he was more than capable of picking her up and forcibly removing her from the premises. 

She steeled herself, but knew she wasn’t able to choose dignity. Couldn’t afford fear. Literally. 

Her legs felt like like heavy bricks. The weight of the world was on her shoulders as she climbed the stairs. 

She walked past what was once Ben’s room. The door was open and the room was empty. She kept going toward the end of the hallway, where the master bedroom was located. Of course, he had moved into his parents’ room. Nothing was sacred.

She lightly knocked on the door. When no one answered, she pushed on the knob, because the door was ever so slightly ajar, and well, if that wasn’t invitation, then what was it?

It was dark inside the room, but the moonlight playing through a curtainless balcony door allowed Rey to make out his shape on the bed. 

She climbed onto the mattress. Her dress was still damp, but she took the risk. There were better reasons for Ben to kick her out of bed. 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered to his tense back. 

Silence.

“You just...I don’t know. We’ve always been like this, haven’t we? Oil and water. But I would never...you’re my family. If you needed me, really needed me, I would have been there for you.”

Silence.

She touched his shoulder with tentative fingers. “Maybe it would be nice to have someone around in the big lonely house who...I don’t know. Understands you at least.” 

More silence. Awkward, long silence. Well. That was that.

“I...I’ll go then.” She hated that her voice shook. She sat up and stared at his motionless form. “Goodbye, Ben.”

A hand gripping her braid stopped her from standing. 

There was a long pause before his voice, deep and dark, finally came. 

“Stay then,” he said. His hand tightened on her hair before he let go. Then she was toppling onto the bed, off balance by the jerk of his hand on hers. “Stay as long as you damn well like, if you’re that pathetic.”

He slung his arm around her waist, a heavy weight anchoring her to the bed. 

“But Rey,” he sighed into her ear. “I’m going to make your life hell.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm badnovels on tumblr. Come be friends!
> 
> Reviews give me life and inspiration.


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